Nice Girls Do It, Too!

It is absolutely true that when online dating sites first started they were populated entirely by perverts, sexual predators, weirdoes, social misfits and emotional wrecks but that is no longer true. Online dating has gone mainstream and has lost all the social stigma it once suffered. Single people of all ages, races, religions and both sexes do it. Short people, tall people, thin people, obese people do it. People from every developed country in the world do it. Nice girls do it, too. The reasons people join online dating sites are as varied as the people who join but mostly they join for three very good reasons: (1) Time (2) Money and (3) It works.

Time: You can go through hundreds of online profiles and look at hundreds of pictures in the same length of time only one real world date takes and the screening is already done for you. You can tell right away if a guy is only looking for casual relationships or long term commitments. How many times have you worked 8 hours, gone home and spent another hour getting ready to go out then gone to the local hang-out for singles only to see the same old jerks, losers and drunks that are always there?

Money: For the price of one evening out on the town you can enjoy an entire month of meeting men from the safety of your own home….do it in your jammies or sweats and with a beauty facial working its magic.

It works. It really does work if you are willing to do the right things. Write a profile that grabs attention, post recent pictures of yourself, be fun and interesting while chatting with the men you meet on line, answering emails promptly and being on time for a pre-arranged online meeting.

Effective Relationship

Relationships of all kinds are often perceived as very delicate things, that require extra effort to maintain. However, a relationship can also be something that can provide security and can also be long lasting despite many trials.


Building an effective and lasting relationships is a necessity for several reasons. For example in a group or organization, the well being of the people depends on how efficient and effective that group or organization works.


The group or organization is also dependent on how the members work well with the management.


An ineffective group or organization can really be very frustrating. An effective group or organization can also ask so much on their members, that sometimes the members would be having no life outside the walls of the area where they work or sacrifice the other aspects of their life just to meet deadlines. For an organization or group with this kind of scenario, relationships can be stressed or suffer from breakdown. People or other entities who depend on these groups or organization also suffer.


Society is defined as a web of relationships, which requires all parties to work and contribute their share in order to achieve a common goal. Having a relationship that is good, where cooperation and respect are manifested, can make society work better. In this way each member works for the good of the whole and towards achieving a common goal.


This can only be attained with effective and efficient relationships. Understanding the other parties' feeling and position creates an effective and efficient relationship. The easiest method to understand what is important to another party is to ask them what they want and listen to what they have to say. When the other party realizes this, they would feel the importance given to them.


Effective and efficient relationships require parties to openly express their feelings and positions on all matters pertinent on the relationship. Assuming that the other party understands our needs and give us when we need it without asking for it is not a good practice.


Respect is the key to relationship. In order to create a more effective relationship, parties should treat each other with respect. We can show respect just by listening to the other party and by trying sincerely to understand how they function. You can also show respect to other parties by confirming that they are doing everything they can.


The opposite of respect is quick forming of judgements based on unfounded facts and prejudice. Respect is the very foundation for a great relationship. This also means respecting yourself and respecting others.
Another key area in forming an effective relationship is to tackle differences of the other party directly. Differences between parties or people are quite interesting. For example in a conversation where each party listens to the other party, you may observe that each is having two different perspectives.


Work towards a win-win solution for both parties.
This can be done when at least one party acknowledges that the relationship is important. That party would then exert more time, effort and energy to understand the other party's needs and deal with it to get it out of the way. Should they fail, it is comforting for that party to know that they tried.


Effectively listening and no pre-judging. This is important if parties are to understand each other. Informal discussions are conducive for parties. They bring out issues and concerns comfortably. They also feel more relaxed making them think more clearly.
Developing an atmosphere where the other party can express their feelings when they need to.
When parties fail to express whatever is on their mind or their feelings, it can get in the way of building an effective relationship.


Parties should be aware that certain things exist naturally but should be controlled in any dealings in any relationship. Human nature is one. Some of these things found in a relationship also include a history of stereotyping or mistrust, blaming the other person or party for a strained relationship, excluding the other party's feelings when focusing on a task, no clear and defined objectives, roles and expectations of each party in a relationship is also unclear.
Relationships are important to anyone, addressing issues and problems right away is a must to further improve the relationship. As they say 'No man is an Island'.

Nice Girls Do Online Dating, Too!

It is absolutely true that when online dating sites first started they were populated entirely by perverts, sexual predators, weirdoes, social misfits and emotional wrecks but that is no longer true. Online dating has gone mainstream and has lost all the social stigma it once suffered. Single people of all ages, races, religions and both sexes do it. Short people, tall people, thin people, obese people do it. People from every developed country in the world do it. Nice girls do it, too. The reasons people join online dating sites are as varied as the people who join but mostly they join for three very good reasons: (1) Time (2) Money and (3) It works.

Time: You can go through hundreds of online profiles and look at hundreds of pictures in the same length of time only one real world date takes and the screening is already done for you. You can tell right away if a guy is only looking for casual relationships or long term commitments. How many times have you worked 8 hours, gone home and spent another hour getting ready to go out then gone to the local hang-out for singles only to see the same old jerks, losers and drunks that are always there?

Money: For the price of one evening out on the town you can enjoy an entire month of meeting men from the safety of your own home….do it in your jammies or sweats and with a beauty facial working its magic.

It works. It really does work if you are willing to do the right things. Write a profile that grabs attention, post recent pictures of yourself, be fun and interesting while chatting with the men you meet on line, answering emails promptly and being on time for a pre-arranged online meeting.

Popular Online Dating Activities

A couple of popular online activities are sharing recipes and bidding at auctions. And both of these easily fit well into online dating opportunities, one of the most popular online activities for singles today.

To help many dates get better acquainted online, here’s what potential cyber-dates do.

Sharing Recipes – People get tired talking about the weather. So a popular subject to turn to is food. Sharing favorite foods and recipes helps break the ice and even forms friendships over culinary skills – or lack of – and tastes. Search your favorite search engine for “free recipes” to share. Take photos of your culinary creations and share them with your date, too.

Bidding at Auctions – Ebay auctions sell nearly anything and everything! So surf around and enter searches like the dates you were in middle school. Share cool memorabilia photos of old games and toys from when you were a child or when your parents or grandparents were little; The Dating Game, Oscar Mayer wiener whistles, The Partridge Family Album, Bobby Sherman’s Album, 45’s and more.

Online dating can be an educational and fun experience. So learn more about each other and have fun while you’re at it. Take a cyber-stroll down memory lane together and see what’s cookin’.

Blind Date vs Internet Date

Your friend has decided that you need help with your social life so she sets you up with a blind date….a friend of a friend of a friend. You, foolishly, accept. Now there you are. It’s less than one hour since you were introduced. You are sitting in a Thai restaurant and you hate Thai food. The entrée has not yet been served.

His idea of enlightened conversation is who will be in the final four…you aren’t into sports. He knows the weekly TV schedule verbatim….you haven’t sat through a movie in months because you run marathons and volunteer at the local food bank. He says, “Volunteering is a waste of time because you can’t help ‘those people’ anyway.” You look at your watch; see that it’s only been 10 minutes since you last looked at it the last time and wonder how long it is before you can gracefully remove yourself from the situation. Been there?

Now imagine a date with someone you met through internet dating and have been chatting online with and exchanging emails with for quite some time. First, you don’t need to be introduced. You already know this man. You are sitting in an Italian restaurant enjoying a delightful meal because you both know that the other’s favorite is Italian.

The conversation flows easily as you discuss common interests. He runs marathons and loves history just like you do. You happily discuss the volunteer work that each of you is involved in. You look at your watch and discover that it is late…very late…where Has the time gone.
There is a big difference between a well-intentioned friend “setting you up” and choosing a man for yourself who shares your interests and tastes, isn’t there? Now which one would you rather have?

Growing Online Dating Relationships

Just like regular real-world relationships, online relationships need tending, to grow over time. Here are some quick growing tips.

1. Take time and make time. Does your online date get in touch with you regularly? Do you do the same? Neglecting virtual meetings can be considered abuse or neglect, so treat each other’s time with respect. If it’s lacking, might mean time to move on.

2. Communication needs to “feel” right for both of you. If one of you is too pushy about meeting, for instance, that can give off bad vibes. So don’t rush. Take time to learn more about each other and develop trust.

3. Respect each others privacy. Don’t share personal email addresses or digital photos online, for example, if your online date sent you the information in confidence.

4. Share special online and offline fun times. Online – send greeting cards, links to favorite places to upload digital photos of your favorite pet, download music and video clips, post on favorite forums of interest. Offline- if you’re exchanging addresses or post office boxes, send print greeting cards and postcards, small items from your area (like a key chain with your state bird).

Tend your online relationship. Water it with care and over time it can sprout and grow.

How Do I Choose the Right Online Dating Service For Me?

With the explosion of online dating sites has come a virtual smorgasbord of choices. There are free sites… I don’t recommend those but if money is a real concern, they are better than nothing. There are the large paid sites with many and varied features like chat, IM and even matching using profiles. There are the less expensive paid sites with few features. There are special interest sites for almost any thing you can think of...outdoor enthusiasts, couch potatoes, religious, non-religious, gays, lesbians…like I said…almost anything you can think of. So what’s a girl to do? A girl should choose the site or sites that best fit her needs.

Here are some things to consider:

(1) Cost. How much do you want or how much can you spend each month for your membership (s)?

(2) Features. Which features are the most important to you?

(A) Profile matching systems. Is this a feature you really want or would you rather decide who is right for you all by yourself?

(B)Chat and IM’s? There are websites who offer chat rooms and IM’s on their sites. Does that matter or would you be happy just sticking to private email.

(C) Outside Events…such as speed dating? Are you interested in that?

(D) Privacy. Some websites allow you to limit who can view your picture or your profile. Does this matter to you or do you want as wide exposure as you can have?

(E) Safety. There are websites who do background checks of all subscribers and certify their age, marital status and background. Would you feel safer using this feature?

These are a few things but not all things you should consider when choosing an online dating service or services. Do your homework and choose wisely for the best results for you.

A New Art Form of Online Flirting

Many of the same things work for online flirting that work for “brick and mortar” flirting and all relationships begin with successful flirting. Flirting is an art that requires oozing confidence without being OTT. If you go too far, she will label you “slimy” If you don’t go far enough, she will label you “wimpy”. So how do you achieve that point half way between slimy and wimpy and do it online without using eye contact or body language? All you have is a computer an internet connection and membership in an online dating site, right?

1. Have fun! Be light-hearted, funny and entertaining. Make her eager to talk to you again. Flirting is playful.

2. Ooze confidence. Successful flirts have a positive outlook on life. You need to transmit the “feel good” factor. An optimistic attitude attracts females like honey attracts flies.

3. 3. Compliment her…and do it often and sincerely. Nothing opens doors like making her feel good about herself. She will want to spend more time with you and if she pays you a compliment say “thank you”. Do Not be self depreciating.

4. Listen…listen….listen. Pay attention to what she says and ask appropriate questions. Get her to open up and talk about herself. Make her feel like she is interesting and that you are interested in her. Works wonders!

5. Don’t be rude. Flirting does not include being sexually explicit nor taking offence if the lady isn’t responding to you. If she isn’t interested, take the hint and move on to the next prospect. If you get a lot of rejections, you should probably consider a different approach.

6. Send an email after you chat. This ranks right up there with sending a thank you note for a gift and it is vital to successful flirting.

Don’t try to go too fast. Flirting is the first step to a successful relationship.